Ask Dr. Mike

Making Positive Change Happen in 2021! On a societal and global level, COVID-19 has made this year a difficult one in so many ways.  Worldwide, close to 1.7 million people have died, and close to 80,000,000 people have become sick with the virus.  Statistics on COVID-19 are also imperfect given testing limitations and the lack of consideration of those who may have it but are asymptomatic, so the number of cases is likely higher.  And the virus has impacted us all individually in so many profound ways – how we work, how we go to school, how we socialize, how [...]

Dr. Mike, My husband and I have watched politics ruin many of our closest friends’ relationships and now it’s happening to us.  I’m wanting to unfriend certain friends on-line because of what I see them posting, and I also don’t even want to have some people in my life anymore at all because their views are so different from ours.  My husband and I are Christians, and we’ve always tried to be non-critical and patient in God’s light, but it’s getting harder to do with everything that’s happening in the US right now.  This has also been very painful for [...]

Dr. Mike, The last few months have been hard for me with coronavirus.  I work in my home office all day now and haven’t been to work since late March.  I haven’t seen a single friend. I’ve gained 15 pounds.  I’m drinking too much, and I can’t even remember the last time I worked out with my gym closing.  I’m around my children and husband (who also works from home) all the time, which I guess should feel good but it doesn’t way too often.  I don’t have energy.  I feel sad most of the time, and I lay awake [...]

Back to School:  Preparing your child for virtual learning To the dismay of many parents, the hybrid option to the academic school year for our children is no longer an option in Loudoun County Public Schools (LCPS).  But what does that mean and is exclusive virtual learning truly the best option?  While parents in our community are split over the decision, I don’t think there really is a best option; we’re in a global pandemic, and as we’ve all learned over the past several months, living with restrictions and compromises is the new normal. There’s no denying that our children [...]

Dr. Mike, Our children are having a very difficult time with the quarantine.  Our 9 year old son has ADHD, and his behaviors are much worse and his ability to focus on school work is just not there…thank goodness the school year is almost over!  It’s too bad because he was doing great academically and with his behaviors before all of this happened.  Whatever we ask of him now, if it doesn’t involve Minecraft or YouTube, he won’t do it or he’ll only do it only after a lot of fighting.  Then there’s our 18 year old daughter who is [...]

Dr. Mike, Our 6 year old daughter needs to sleep with us every night now.  It’s 100% because of the coronavirus since she’s been sleeping by herself for years with no issues.  She started by coming into our room at night crying about “nightmares” and “scary dreams” a few weeks ago and now she needs to stay with us every night.  When we’ve tried to get her to stay in her own bed, she cries non-stop.  She’s also resorting to baby talk when expressing herself, which is a new thing for us.  When we try to correct that, she also [...]

Dr. Mike, My wife has decided that she does not want us to go to the beach for our annual big family beach gathering this July because of coronavirus.  Even though all of our extended family are just going to pile into a huge beach house rental, she’s afraid that we or our kids will somehow “get sick and die.”  I think she’s being completely crazy about the beach and everything else with the virus.  She wipes down our delivered groceries before putting them away, she makes us all take showers after we return home from being outside in the [...]

5 Psychological Tips To Help You Get Through The Quarantine While no one knows for certain when the coronavirus will end, it appears that the virus and quarantine will continue on for now.  This has been a very difficult time for us all; and, for many across the U.S. (and the rest of the world) our social, work, school and financial lives have been upended beyond belief.  This has understandably led to increased stress and other sorts of emotional struggles. As a psychologist in private practice, I wholly appreciate that the coronavirus and the quarantine have impacted us all differently, [...]

The recent college admissions scandal has sent a shock wave throughout the country, and the topic has come up for me repeatedly with parents. The scandal has caused the parents I see to more immediately deal with the anxiety they experience regarding their children’s academic futures. College has historically been the path many take toward achieving later vocational success. How do you get your kid into college? It’s not your job to get your kid in college, it’s your kid’s job to do that. As the old adage goes, “You can bring a horse to water, but you can’t make him [...]

Dr. Mike, We found a Juul and other vaping gear in our 14-year-old son’s backpack recently and confronted him. It took some pressure, but he eventually owned up to it. He also eventually accepted our zero tolerance for vaping due to its harmful side-effects, most notably nicotine addiction. Well, kids will be clever, and now he’s asked us if he could vape without nicotine. He says vaping “calms” him and that everyone is doing it every day, and what’s the big deal if there’s no nicotine in it. My husband and I see his point of view but still feel [...]